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November 01, 2005

Gomery Report released

The Gomery Report came out today.

That statement means absolutely nothing to my American readers, but for my Canadian readers it represents the Next Big Thing in politics. Let me see if I can put it in an American scenario: Imagine that it's 2009 and California wants to secede from the US because it's, like, sooo different from the rest of America and deserves to be treated as a distinct society. It plans to hold a referendum on the subject (especially apt, given how fond Californians are of their "propositions"). The Democratic party, in its historic takeover of Congress and the Presidency in 2008, make unity of the country an important part of their platform. They make good on this promise, establishing a new federal program that is essentially a feel-good advertising initiative (or propaganda machine, depending on your position) to roll pork into California and get Californians to appreciate being part of America. The enabling legislation for this program puts all the financial responsibility in the West Wing, and Pres. H. Clinton chooses her good buddy A. Sleezeball to administer the program (and maintain plausible deniability about its actions). In turn, Sleezeball hires Thief, Goon, and Good-for-nothing to figure out where the money should go. They decide to send it to advertising firms that only spend 3 cents for every dollar that is given them. And in turn these companies kick back around 30% of their government contract to the Democratic Party. The vote is held, the Californians narrowly remain American, and everybody claps Clinton and her team on the back... until the accountants start asking questions.

Haven't read it yet, but I bet it's juicy. Some of the characters involved are rumored to have operated like Mafia men, carrying around cases full of money.

Posted by The Greatness at November 1, 2005 03:59 PM


someone plz explain to me what exactly the gomery report is . i have a report to do and i have no idea what the hell it is and i need alot of help .plz

Posted by: bobbi at December 21, 2005 06:23 PM

Well, you could start by reading the link here. Also try http://www.cbc.ca/news/background/groupaction/gomeryreport_phaseone.html
for the full report. Basically, the Gomery Report is the written findings of Judge Gomery from his inquiry into the sponsorship scandal. It consists of two parts, the fact finding part and the "how to make sure it never happens again" part. The first part is all we have at the moment; the second part is due to come out in March or April I believe. (Part of the Liberal party's election strategy has been to stay in power until the final report was released, but the first part is quite juicy and it riled up enough MPs to nix that possibility.)

Posted by: The Greatness at December 22, 2005 10:09 AM